Best Ways to Calm Yourself Down
When feeling angry or anxious, certain practices like breathing techniques and emotional energy release can help with calming down.
It is normal to worry or feel upset at times.
However, if anxiety or anger overwhelms you and you cannot calm down, it can be challenging to manage.
Having some strategies that you are familiar with can help you calm down in such moments. You can consider adding the following calming tactics to your toolbox.
Breathe
Breathing is the number one and most effective technique for reducing anger and anxiety quickly.
When you experience anxiety or anger, you typically breathe quickly and shallowly. This sends a message to your brain, which reinforces your fight-or-flight response in a positive feedback loop. To break this loop and calm down, taking long, deep breaths can be helpful.
There are different breathing techniques that can help you calm down when you’re feeling anxious. One such technique is three-part breathing, which involves taking a deep breath in and then exhaling fully while paying attention to your body.
Once you feel comfortable with deep breathing, you can try changing the ratio of inhalation and exhalation to 1:2. This means that you slow down your exhalation so that it’s twice as long as your inhalation.
It’s important to practice these techniques while you’re calm so that you know how to do them when you’re feeling anxious.
Recognize that you’re upset or nervous
It is beneficial to acknowledge and express your feelings of anxiety or anger, as doing so may decrease their intensity.
Test your ideas
When feeling anxious or angry, it is common to experience irrational thoughts that may not always be logical. These thoughts often revolve around the worst-case scenario. You may find yourself stuck in a cycle of “what ifs,” which can lead to self-sabotage and negatively impact various aspects of your life.
When you experience one of these thoughts, stop and ask yourself the following questions:
✅Is this a likely event?
✅Is this a sensible idea?
✅Has this been my experience before?
✅What could possibly go wrong? Can I manage that?
After you have gone through the questions, it is time to reframe your thinking. Instead of saying “I cannot walk across that bridge. What if there is an earthquake and it falls into the water?”, tell yourself “There are people who walk across that bridge every day, and it has never fallen into the water.”
Release the anxiety or anger
You are recommended to gain emotional strength with exercise. Walk or run. Engaging in some physical activity releases serotonin to help you calm down and feel better.
However, it is important to avoid physical activities that involve expressing anger, such as punching walls or yelling. These activities can actually increase feelings of anger. Because they reinforce emotions and make you feel better as a result of anger.
Imagine yourself at ease
To use this tip, you should practice the breathing techniques you have learned. Take a few deep breaths, then close your eyes and visualize yourself as calm. Imagine your body relaxed and picture yourself working through a stressful or anxiety-provoking situation while remaining calm and focused.
By creating a mental image of what it looks like to stay calm, you can refer back to that image when you feel anxious. This will help you stay calm and focused when dealing with stressful situations.
Change your focus
When feeling uncomfortable, it’s often best to step away from the situation by looking in another direction, leaving the room, or going outside.
Take some time to exercise so that you can make better decisions. When we feel anxious or angry, we tend to engage in survival thinking instead of our best thinking. Survival thinking is useful when our life is in danger, but if the situation isn’t life-threatening, we need to use our best thinking to make the right decisions.
Find a centerpiece
When you feel anxious or angry, a lot of your energy is spent on irrational thoughts. However, when you are calm, you can find a “centering object” such as a small stuffed animal, a polished rock that you can keep in your pocket, or a locket that you wear around your neck.
Tell yourself that you will touch this object whenever you experience anxiety or frustration. This helps to center you and calm your thoughts. For instance, if you’re at work and your boss is making you anxious, you can gently rub the locket around your neck.
Find pressure spots to reduce tension and rage
Getting a massage or acupuncture can be an effective way to manage feelings of anxiety and anger. However, finding the time to do so can be challenging. Fortunately, there is a technique called acupressure that you can do on yourself for instant anxiety relief.
Acupressure involves applying pressure with your fingers or hand to certain points on your body. This pressure can release tension and help your body to relax.
One good place to start is the point where the inside of your wrist meets your hand. Simply press your thumb on this area for two minutes to help relieve tension.
Realise your shoulders
If you find yourself feeling tense, it’s likely that your posture will be affected as well. To help with this, sit up straight, take a deep breath, and relax your shoulders. You can do this by concentrating on bringing your shoulder blades together and then downwards. This will lower your shoulders. Take a few deep breaths and repeat this exercise several times throughout the day.
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